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If you think you’re stuck with depression, think again!
posted in: depression, Hot Tips and Good Value (Tags: 'peace of mind', 'richest man in babylon', 'think and grow rich', depression, Discover Peace of Mind, Richest Man in Babylon free, Think and Grow Rich free) - No Comments
14.Jan.09 7:25 pm
Here is how easy it is to lose trust…
posted in: Trust (Tags: Clean Seas, Discover Peace of Mind, EnSearch, Matrix Composites, Neptune Marine, Nufarm, Rodinia Oil, rodney lovell, Trust) - No Comments
13.Apr.12 11:57 am
Lack of trust is not just the domain of ‘used car sellers’, it is obvious in areas such as politics, workplaces, many Ebay sellers, local clubs, and even amongst family and neighbours. The stock market can show us a very simple example of how to lose trust – Make a statement, then don’t back it up.
Of the many companies that have lost my trust, such as Clean Seas Tuna, Matrix Composites, Neptune Marine, and Nufarm, Rodinia Oil, an exploration company, provides the latest example. On 4 May 2011, they proudly announced that their join venture partner, EnSearch, was no longer under Administration. WooHoo! Rodinia went on to say how they had “liaised extensively with them in order to protect and secure its financial and operational positions”. Well done Rodinia! Rodinia is managed by very experienced people overseen by a very expereinced board. Obviously they know what they are doing. They had plans to drill 4 wells with an option to drill some more.
However, by November 2011, just 6 months after Rodinia assured us of ‘securing its financial and operational positions’, they have served “default notices on its Officer Basin joint venture partner for failure to pay its share of costs”. This joint venture partner has responded by serving dispute notices on Rodinia! “The parties are about to commence a dispute resolution process”. “Rodinia’s ability to finance its future operations is dependent upon its ability to obtain new sources of financing and the existence of economically recoverable hydrocarbons.”
The management and Board of Rodinia, experienced in their field, have made a statement about “securing” their positions ,and, planned to drill 4 wells. Instead they have drilled and abandoned 2 wells, and placed themselves in a disputed position.
Of course, “Rodinia will be conducting a comprehensive review of operations for 2012″ and “opportunities are currently being evaluated, with interest being expressed by several oil and gas companies.”
Here we are in April. No resolution to anything. No update at all to investors. It’s not just Rodinia have done or said, or what they have omitted to say or do. There is also implied meanings. Fine print is obsolescent.
How to get people to trust you
Trust has evaporated.
If you’re a rosy, glass half full type of person, how would you look at this situation? To me, the glass is half empty, warning bells are ringing and the drop from $2.10 to 10 cents is indicative that no matter what expertise the board and management have, it hasn’t meant much at all.
What does this mean for you and I? In simple terms, if we want to be trusted, be trustworthy. Look inward and evaluate what you do and say to others. Are you trustworthy? Look inward to do better outwardly.
I often make a statement that I can help people overcome depression in 3 days, sometimes less, provided they have an open mind. A recent client said he learnt more in one weekend with me than 9 years with a psychologist! 9 years!
The psychologist no longer asked questions, checked progress, or requested the client’s opinion, just wrote another medication prescription. Would you continue to trust?
Trust will often be broken or misplaced, however, life is to be managed not mastered. Only then can you truly Discover Peace of Mind.
Rodney Lovell
Spot the problem and save a life.
posted in: Embrace the negative (Tags: mistakes, observation, problems) - No Comments
6.Mar.12 9:28 am
If you work in manufacturing, you will know that one of the most time saving and money saving things you can do is to look for problems. First, build a quality system. Second, look for bottlenecks and mistakes. For example, a faulty use-by date stamp may ruin a complete batch of otherwise perfectly good product. A disgruntled employee may become a saboteur. Looking at the glass half empty can save a lot of headaches. It has for me.
It was a fine but cloudy day during the late afternoon, back in October 2004. Ferntree Gully Road was smooth. On one side of the 6 lanes, a footpath fed the neat houses. On the other side, a gravel shoulder fronted an industrial area.
Thousands of cars busily travelled in both directions on this Sunday afternoon. In one of those cars, the radio blared. My daughter and I sang along. Suddenly, the singing stopped. “That’s not right”, I yelled. My daughter, like the thousands of other motorists, had not seen the obvious problem. I explained….
“Old people don’t push walking frames along the gravel in front of an industrial area. She is on the wrong side of the road!”
We stopped the car. An exhausted elderly woman was pleased to see us. We gave her a drink. She was heading home. However, for her, home was one hours DRIVE away! “Can’t be possible”, I thought. A second problem now presented itself. She can’t be here, and live so far away.
We drove to the Knox police station. The police investigated the elderly lady’s background. My daughter and I kept the elderly lady company.
After nearly 8 hours, close to midnight, it was discovered that this elderly lady was missing from a local elderly person’s home. They hadn’t realised, until then, that she was missing!
For the elderly lady, her mind had stopped 5 years earlier. She had altzheimer’s. In her mind, she still lived an hour’s drive away. Her husband was still alive.
That day, I noticed a problem that thousands had missed. Who’s glass was full and who’s was half empty?
Rodney Lovell
The Glass Is Half Something….
posted in: Embrace the negative (Tags: emotion, life-cycle, rodney lovell) - No Comments
17.Feb.12 1:21 pm
Recently I had an interessting discussion with a gentleman who queried my observation that sometimes the glass IS half empty. He lives his life, so he says, as a ‘glass half full person’. So, let me quickly explain why that could be a problem…
The trees are emptying and the mountains are full of color
The word, “negative”, has been given bad press. As leaves fall from a tree each autumn, that is the ‘negative’ part of the life-cycle. Yet absolutely integral to the process of regrowth. As the leaves progressively fall from the tree, they are emptying, not filling. Yet, for anyone who has seen the miraculous fall festival across the New England region in the United States, the vista is ‘filled’ with color. The trees are emptying, yet the mountains are full of colour. It’s all in the context…
In ourselves, some people want to keep all their friends, belongings, values, attitudes and beliefs without ever shedding any that are outdated. This inhibits new growth. It’s been said that nature abhors a vacuum. Continully, taking, gathering and hoarding is linear, not cyclical. Nature is cyclical. Even our lives, while choronilogically linear, are filled with cycles of growth, learning and development. It’s all in the context…
What is the best way to learn? Perfectionists may look for the one part of their work that is wrong, but focusing on the imperfection would make them imperfectionists, wouldn’t it? Is that a positive or a negative? Well, that depends on why they’re looking for the negative aspect of their work. Often, the best way to learn is to make mistakes! For many, surely, a mistake is a negative. If so, embracing the negative reveals the pearl of wisdom that awaits, that is, the lesson from the mistake. Becoming frustrated with a mistake is to ignore the pearl.
Having a perfect upbringing may sound wonderful, but what happens when you grow up and encounter a toxic boss, or a friendship turns sour, or you encounter severe conflict. MANY people fall apart, because they have minimal experience with conflict, therefore have low resilience skills and expectations of life that are shattered. I’m certainly not promoting conflict, just demonstrating that everything has two sides. One side is a postive and the other a negative. And nature has decreed that lessons can be learned from both.
If you are simply a ‘glass half full’ person all the time, you are missing half of life’s opportunities.
Those in the world who are whingers, complainers, passive-aggressive or put themselves down are not ‘glass half empty’ people, they’re just people who whinge, complain, act passively aggressive, or put themselves down. The world is full of them. Our job is to learn to live amongst them! The downside of being self-aware is to see all those that are not self-aware.
I was speaking with a young lady. She had been told by her mother that she was “too emotional”. There are many in the world who attempt to suppress their emotion. Yet that young lady uses the full range of emotions as a strength. For her work in Advertising, she is able to empathise with her client, feel their needs, put herself in the shoes of the consumer to check that the advertising message will be well received. Embracing her negative – ”Too emotional” – she found a pearl. Even better, she took her discovery and promoted it. Addressing an audience of disillusioned youth and said, “What is it that people keep putting you down for? Is their something that is a hidden strength in it? Examine this so-called negative and you may well find a pearl”. Even with somestreet kids, their resilience and skills at what they do are exceptional. They are climbing the ladder to success in their chosen field. The benefit to them appears not when they realise they are climbing a ladder, but when they realise they have it leaning on the wrong wall. Transplant those skills into, say, outdoor education, relationship management, or marine biology, and you may just find an exceptionally talented worker. It’s all in the context…
The young lady I mentioned likes to go to the movies. She explains, “When I see a sad movie I like to be sad. When I see a horror movie I like to be scared. When I see a motivating movie, I like to feel motivated. It’s all in the context.” Having a full range of emotions, and using them, is a rare talent. Likewise, it can be hard to find people who realise that sometimes the glass is half full and othertimes it’s half empty. It’s all in the context…
The gentleman I spoke with said he was a ‘glass half full’ sort of guy. Yet he had depression. If you truly want to Discover Peace of Mind, some outdated beliefs have to change. What will they be for you……?
Rodney Lovell
Another month begins – What do you do?
posted in: General, Planning (Tags: goals, resolutions) - No Comments
1.Feb.12 5:42 pm
Happy new month! How’s all those resolutions going? I once kept my new year’s resolution for 23 years. It was – “Don’t make resolutions”. I was very proud of keeping that resolution, until I realised that not making resolutions meant the progress in my goals was minimal. Hmmm.
So here I am at the beginning of another new month, and I’m updating my resolutions. Some, I’ve found, have a use-by date, or don’t form part of my bigger goals. It’s good to have a clean out, and to confirm that other goals remain. There is a lot of groaning, planning and thinking. I’ve used a variety of methods to keep track of my goals and their progress.
Life is to be managed, not mastered. How do you manage your goals each month?
I Was Inspired By Their Work Ethic
posted in: Hot Tips and Good Value (Tags: Cradle Huts, Grant Palmer, Harley Tuleja, Helen Pilati, Ian Johnson, Linda Tyler, Linton Tuleja, Michael Butlin, Quamby Estate, Work ethic) - No Comments
25.Jan.12 12:01 am
Over Christmas I was fortunate enough to stay at the Quamby Estate near Launceston in Tasmania. The Quamby Estate also houses the base of the Cradle Huts group, who arrange treks through the Cradle Mountain region. Part of the attraction is that the trek group stays in private huts with hot showers, private rooms, and prepared meals. Cushy trekking!
The guides we had were brothers Linton Tuleja and Harley Tuleja. Linton and Harley carried the biggest packs, supervised the group, shared information on flora and fauna, history and waterholes, encouraged the walkers, provided first aid, provided snacks, cooked the evening meal, baked bread, laid out breakfast, did the dishes, swept the floor, scrubbed the showers, cleaned the toilets, never once complained. Their work ethic was amazing and inspirational.
Over the years, I’ve worked for, with or managed hundreds of workers, many of them quite good. Yet only a few really stand out in my memory as super-consistent in their demeanor AND their contribution, and how easy I found them to deal with during my time with them - Helen Pilati, Michael Butlin, Linda Tyler, Grant Palmer, Ian Johnstone, Robert Best, Javed. Linton and Harley just about topped everything I’ve seen.
When I get tired and want to put things off, I glance at a new note that I’ve made that simply says, “Work Ethic”. Linton and Harley – thank you.
Rodney Lovell
The Glass Is Half Empty, and that’s ok
posted in: Embrace the negative (Tags: 'compensation essay', Discover Peace of Mind, Glass is half empty, Napoleon Hill, negative, pma, polarity, positive, positive mental attitude; 'think and grow rich', Ralph Waldo Emerson, rodney lovell) - No Comments
24.Jan.12 12:11 pm
This week I decided to change the name of my blog. I love the old name – “Thoughts are Things” – borrowed from Napoleon Hill’s classic text,Think and Grow Rich. The idea that thoughts ARE things is something that is so profound. Sometimes a profound truth is found in a simple sentence. Napoleon Hill espoused a postive mental attitude (PMA), which he meant to overcome fears and unhelpful thoughts and look for the helpful, positive side to situations. Great advice.
It seems to me, however, that the word “Negative” has been somewhat misconstrued over the years. For those that have attended my workshops you will know that I love to embrace the negative, for within its crusty shell lies a pearl waiting to be discovered.
Embrace the negative for within its crusty shell lies a pearl waiting to be discovered
As Ralph Waldo Emerson said way back in 1841 in his essay titled Compensation, nature has polarity in everything. You can’t have one end without the other. Nature has seasons, cycles, north/south. Remember, a battery requires both positive and negative to harness energy. Having both positive and negative, as appropriate, is part of a positive mental attitude.
Recently, I had a visitor to my house. In our yard is a large pot that my wife has made into a fish pond. Sometimes the pond’s little fountain directs a trickle of water over the edge, slowly and discreetly draining the pond. Our visitior saw the pond and said, “What a lovely idea, half filling a pot and making it into a fish pond”. I looked at it and said, “The pond is half empty”. It’s all a matter of perspective, and, if I didn’t stop the water draining, the pond would have been totally empty! I often see problems, things that are wrong, out of place. Does that mean I’m negative? “Hey Rod, you always seem to spot what’s wrong. Why can’t you see what’s right?” I do see what’s right, it’s the part that’s not wrong! And usually, what’s right doesn’t need fixing!
Fortunately, I was able to see what was wrong with being ‘treated’ for depression. Depression is not an illness, it’s a symptom. Once I saw what was wrong, I was able to work on fixing it. And here I am now helping others. What a positive.
Over the years I’ve grown sick and tired of hearing people say, “Are you a glass half full person or a glass half empty person” in a lame attempt to coerce others to their way of thinking. Usually, these people don’t even come close to meeting their own lofty standards. Happy to demand others live a particular way whilst not having their own life in order. When I encounter them, my bullshit meter goes off the scale! Trying to “be positive” all the time defies nature’s polarity!
The phrase, “The Glass is Half Empty” has been stolen and misrepresented. I’m stealing it back. There is nothing wrong with identifying when the glass is half empty. And I’ve found that there is much to be learnt in embracing the negative. Of course, sometimes the glass is half full. You just have to know which is which.
What in your life has been stolen that you’d like back? A great holiday spot, stolen by a bad experience? A nice tasting meal, that was once made by an ex-spouse? A song? Whatever it is, steal it back and Discover Peace of Mind.
Now, I’ve got to work out how & when to change the heading of my blog. My diary is half full, or is it half empty?
Rodney Lovell
What would you do?
posted in: Violence (Tags: abuse, marriage, sexual violence, verbal abuse) - No Comments
13.Jan.11 5:40 pm
Recently, I had an conversation with a client whose ex-wife has moved in with a ‘working man’ who enjoys watching and simulating sexual violence.The problem for my client is that both his daughters are living in the same house and he doesn’t want this man’s influence, innuendo or state of mind to affect his daughters.
It’s an interesting point because women who become victim to abuse, either verbal or physical ALWAYS later say, “How did I get into that situation?” The easiest answer is “INCREMENTALLY”.
These men don’t have a plan because they operate at a sub-conscious, immediate gratification level. In practical terms, they simply test your limits. A comment here, an inappropriate touch there, and it is the woman who suddenly finds herself in the awkward position of trying to say NO. Each time you don’t say NO, allows them to try something a little riskier next time. Suddenly, you’re fighting them off in the broom closet and saying, “How did I get into this situation?”
Often, the man will pose the comment or act as a joke. If you say NO, their response is, “Can’t you take a joke”, which belittles you and keeps them safe.
Therefore, my clients concerns about his daughters are valid. Although the ‘working man’ may not physically touch them, he is incrementally belittling them and adding innuendo to conversations, so smut becomes the norm. If they speak up, they are shouted down, and incrementally they become politely submissive. This can have a dramatic effect on other relationships the daughters may have in their future.
Unfortunately for my client, his ex-wife has not yet reached the stage of “How did I get into this situation?”, and so she indirectly & unknowingly supports the negative influence on her children. Nor does she realise the slow drain on her own self-respect. Inevitably, her family and other outsiders will see what is developing but they will not say anything. It’s been proven that in award situations, rather than tell the truth, people often tell you what they think you want to hear! So, you can’t rely on family and friends to save your bacon when it’s clear to everyone but you that you’re making the wrong decisions!
Without ‘insider’ support my client is practically powerless to alter the situation his ex-wife has imposed on their daughters. What would you do?
Is this a good influence?
Live outside the Matrix
posted in: depression, Imagination (Tags: 'peace of mind', depression, depression cure, Discover Peace of Mind, Neo, rodney lovell, The Matrix) - No Comments
6.Jan.11 9:10 am
Have you seen the movie, The Matrix? If you haven’t, I urge you to do so. I’m not a big sci-fi fan, but I loved this movie.
Billions of people roaming through life as best they know it. For Mr Anderson, aka Neo, life is missing something. Without fulfilment, acceptance, control and energy, Neo delves into his one passion, which links him to new acquaintances. For so much of the story, Neo is looking for answers.
During his journey Neo begins to recognise his inherent talent. He has hope, which quickly fades as his questions are unanswered. His belief begins to waver. At the point where Neo is most in need of his amazing talent, he is ambushed and is suddenly shot. This analogy is so similar to the spirit of people who suffer from depression. Glimpses of hope. Recognition of talent and passion. Looking for answers. Often their spirit is ambushed….and in its weakened state spirit is easy to kill off. A man with no spirit is quickly fading, not vitally thriving. All that survives is a faint glimmer of hope.
At his moment of ultimate darkness, Neo returns to life. The most infinitesimal illumination is brightest in a dark room. Having hit rock bottom, he can drop no further. His resurrection is wonderfully sudden. As quickly as he was shot down, he is able to rise….but with the benefit of his journey, he now sees the answer. He could not have arrived at this point without his failures to learn from. Nature is an amazing thing. Mistakes and challenges lead to advancement, fulfillment, control, acceptance and safety. Experience leads to growth….sudden growth.
A question can be answered in a few seconds. If that answer resonates with you, your change can be that sudden…a few seconds. Just look how quickly your mood can change when somebody dangerously cuts you off on the freeway, or, when you get promoted. It’s the same to escape depression. The moment of change can be sudden. Your career may take some years, but the promotion is simply a moment in time. Your drive may be just a few kilometres, but being cut off takes just a moment. Your life has taken many years to reach its current point and along the way, there has been many ‘moments’. You will be reading this for a reason, so you will be looking for your moment, your answer.
For me, I escaped depression in under one hour. Firstly, one simple phrase was the answer I was looking for. Secondly, a trip to the library to research my new understanding was enough to lift weights from my shoulders that I’d been carrying for years. I saw the world in a whole new way, recognising systems, signs, and symptoms.
But knowing the answer is not enough for lasting fulfillment. Neo, and I, had to apply these new insights. Knowing the answer can help you escape from depression. It is the application of knowledge that is the ultimate transformation.
I see people time and time again who say to me, ‘Yes, I know that’. They know it intellectually, but they certainly do not apply what they know. The word “but” is used a lot. ‘ I know it, but…’ The answer must be lived, not filed. You can be a beacon of inspiration by doing no more than your daily routine, and yes, it must be a different routine than what you have now.
Neo coupled his new knowledge with application and conquered The Matrix. His results were astonishing….like yours will be.
If you think you’re stuck with depression, think again. Discover Peace of Mind.
Happy new year,
Rodney Lovell
16.Nov.10 12:11 pm
Simply put, White Ribbon Day, focuses on eliminating violence against women and girls by men or boys. It’s a pretty simple concept that I agree with. I became a White Ribbon Ambassador, and, made a committment at http://www.myoath.com.au/ Check out the website and make a committment too.
But it’s not just committing to not being violent against women, it is that you will SPEAK UP if necessary.
I’ve shared my values with a few of my mates. Basically, I don’t want them to put me in a position of having to ‘protect’ them. Some guys think they can do anything and then I, and others, shouldn’t say anything – but then the onus has been transferred to me! I say the them, “Don’t you put me in this position”. It isn’t dobbing. If they can’t toe the line, I’m not their bail ticket.
An old mate who I’d known for over 25 years, Alan, had been verbally abusive to his wife of just 8 months or so, and her daughter, during my visits. At the time, I was too stupid to say anything. In hindsight I should’ve simply said, “Alan, ease up, that’s not right”. It wasn’t my problem to solve, but it was my responsibility to speak up if she was being abused. And it’s not just relating to violence against women.
I once had a friend at work who would nick off early. But as his manager I had to haul him over the coals for it. He said to me, “I thought you were my friend”. My reply was simple. “I thought you were my friend, and if you were, you wouldn’t have put me in this situation.”
If a guy wants to play up on his wife – someone I know, don’t expect me to ‘keep it quiet’ from her. If I’m going to be looking her in the eye, mate, don’t put me in the awkward position. And it happened to me too. The abusive Alan mentiioned above, began an affair with my wife. Later when I found out, he was puzzled why I wouldn’t ‘get over it’. He tried to make it my fault that our friendship fractured. “If you were my friend, Alan, you wouldn’t have put my in this situation.”
The funny thing is, I heard Alan tell my wife he loved her, on the night he proposed to his wife! I simply dismissed it as ‘beer talk’, but I should have said something there and then. I didn’t want to spoil their night in front of 100 people. I was his best friend at that night. Yet, he shouldn’t have put me in that position. If the night turned sour, it was his fault not mine.
Over many years, I’ve not spoken up about lot’s of things, things that I should have. “Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.” Martin Luther King
There are all sorts of reasons why we should speak up. White Ribbon Day is just one.
Rodney Lovell